CHRISTMAS EVE JOY

 This is the sixth Christmas I've done as a parent. I counted. 

Although we're getting our Christmas day traditions pretty down, Christmas Eve is a new adventure every year.

So this year we took a rainy walk. We had hamburgers and fries and watched the rain come down out the window. We sat in our little booth our family of five and when we finished the rain stopped, leaving us a treat of puddles to splash in on the walk back. 

We went to our church's candlelight service as my mommy heart delighted having my kids hold their own candles signifying Jesus' light spreading in the world and my heart knowing that each of them carry that light was happy.

We had dinner at my sister and her husband's new restaurant as Christmas loomed in the air and the kids ran around with their cousins laughing and playing and my  heart filled with joy at the thought of the memories each one of them was making.

At night I sat in my bed and I had a real quiet moment with God.

I am so thankful for his son. I am so grateful for a savior. I prayed for his joy to fill our hearts, for it to overflow, that no presents under a tree, no extravagant traditions could ever compare. 

As I looked back at these pictures, I realized...he already had. He already had filled our hearts with his joy, it's there and it's overflowing and that is what we pass on, more than any tradition. 

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." - Isaiah 9:6

MY INTROVERTED KARATE KID

Life lately. 

I am the mother of an introvert. 

I like introverts. They're not so quick to  divulge themselves to you, they're like a secret club that once you are a member of this club you get the rare opportunity to see something truly amazing. My husband is an introvert. Me...probably not so much. You probably could just label me under weird...but like always...i digress.

We've started homeschooling Henry this year, and one of the things I really love is getting to watch first hand him discover new things. When he discovers something that brings him joy and gets his little light shining, we invest in it. We invest in him and him becoming the person God's created him to be.

Currently, for this kid...karate is one of those things. I didn't think I would be a "Karate Mom"....but I've gotta tell you....I am LOVING karate! All of the "Yes, Sir" "No, Sir" and the physicality of it. He's a little goofy with it, dancing and practicing his "moves" almost to a point where I think he forgets others are around...but it's so awesome to watch. My little Karate kid. It's not just another "thing" to drag him to or keep him busy, I see this guy's little light shine outside of our own secret club. 

Also, he recently earned his Gold belt...so you know...I wouldn't mess with him...

and as always....we brought all the homies...  

Reflecting on this:

"for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith." -1 John 5:4 (NIV)

I use to worry a bit too much about my son, afraid that people would not always "get" his reserved personality. I would spend moments crying afraid that i would fail him for worrying too much or apologizing to people for him not talking to them or him coming off rude.

God's word soothes this mother's heart. Reminds me that God has him in his hands, that his son overcame the world so that through faith my son can. Aside from me knowing better than to worry, this promise he gives us, is life giving and helps me to remember and appreciate the way he made my son, the wonderfully and fearfully made boy he gave me. 

TURNING 33

 We went to Disneyland and I turned 33. I feel like when you go to Disneyland and you turn 33, the least you can do is a blog post.

Currently I'm writing this post and I am not in Disneyland, instead I'm with a fussy baby girl on my lap and my two older loves playing Legos and monsters and chasing each other only to stop for a breath and a snack. I have a floor full of cheerios and I can hear the washing machine in the background. Life is beautiful and this is what being 33 looks like for me.

I am currently running my race in life.

As we get closer to Christmas and reflect more and more on the Gospel, I take in what led up to the birth of our Savior. Each person, a Mother, a Father, a Shepherd and many others running their race all in which led them to the Birth of Christ. They were obedient in their roles, not looking at what others were doing and responding to God in a "Can't I just do what they're doing?" I look at the mothers and how they were not handed the typical situation for their children. Mary herself had a response of, "I am the Lord's servant...May your word to me be fulfilled." (Luke 1:38 NIV) This is what motherhood would look like for her. Elizabeth, who was seen as old and barren became pregnant all for God's plan and purpose, this is what becoming a mom looked like for her.

I think of my role, my obedience and where God is leading me, remembering that God uses a Shepherd, he uses a mother, he uses a father, he uses a 33 year old homeschooling mother of 3, a wife and a woman often in need of grace all for his plan and purpose.

Instead of looking at what the other moms, or women my age or families are doing I am pressed in to what God has currently placed in my lap, the cheerios on the floor, the noise in the background and I say "I am the Lord's servant." I will take everything he has given me and try to make it God honoring, knowing that it will lead me to Jesus. I place his word and joy in my heart.

"Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches." -1 Corinthians 7:17 (NIV)

BECOMING A BALLERINA

Lucia my little Ballerina. She is as sweet as she is strong-willed and now once a week she gets to be a ballerina. I think the long time buried dancer in me just about did a triple pirouette when she put her little tights and leotard on. I wish I could tell you that we were all cool and collected and extremely sophisticated bringing her to class...but then, you know me don't you? You better believe we went posse in tow and cheered her on! 

Once a week, she gets to be a little ballerina once a week. 

I began to think about this. Obviously, if she really wanted to pursue becoming a ballerina we would not leave it at once a week. We would practice, we would cultivate our skill. You couldn't possibly become a ballerina if you only attended class once a week and let it be the only source of ballet exposure. If this small window of concentrated time were all you gave to ballet.

I've been working on becoming a more disciplined woman of God. 

I've seen pictures and heard of women who wake up early before their children to spend some time with God. I think "YES! That is what I need! How disciplined would that make me!" For the record, I am not a morning person, I am the girl who rolls her eyes at the Proverbs 31 woman waking up before the sun. That woman makes me look like the Jonah Woman....it would take a giant whale to get me out of bed that early and you better believe there will be some grumbling....but i digress.

So I've been waking up early, before my kids. I've set this time aside to pray to read to draw closer to The Almighty. It's been great, I mean truly I'm getting to focus more on God. But here's the deal....and you knew there would be one, right? It felt unfinished. I feel a little weird admitting this, but it felt like something was missing. 

Now, here is what I believe God is revealing to me...

God and prayer can not be left at this small window of concentrated time. 

You cannot become a ballerina if you only go to class once a week and leave it at that.

I cannot become a disciplined woman of God if I pray during this one window of time if I turn to scripture this one moment of my day. Sure this time set aside is a great start and foundation, it is the 'Ballet Class' but as we all know, we need to practice and continue on what we learned if we are to become ballerinas. 

So here's the deal. I'll continue to set aside that morning time alone with God, but also He needs to be there the rest of my day. I need to bring my everyday moments to God. I need to pray continuously. I need to pray when i feel like it and pray when i don't. I need to pray when it's loud as well as in those quiet moments. I need to pray when someone pops in my head and give thanks when there's just gratitude to give. Pray. Meditate. Confess. Worship. and then maybe I'll become an awesome "Ballerina"! 

So Pray on Prayers...Pray on!

"In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other’s spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out." -Ephesians 6:18 (MSG)

"Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." -1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NIV)

and one of my favorites...

" So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering." -Romans 12:1 (MSG)

ANGORA LAKES AND CHANGING SEASONS

Twelve years ago we took a hike with some friends and swam in a lake. I was only 20 and he was 21. I think often of that couple that sat on that rock in the middle of the lake. We both agree that we were starting to fall in love at this point, as a friend captured this moment from the beach, neither one of us aware. 

I think about that young couple who had no idea what laid in store for them, falling in love but so much more. As we sat on that rock, we had no idea that one day there would be a Henry, a Lucia and a Selah. We had no idea there would be a home we would make together, a family. No idea that 12 years later we would visit that same lake with our 3 children, carrying a whole lot more love on that hike then we had before. 

God is so amazing my friends. 

I think of how we had no idea what was in store for us, but God knew all along. He knew us and who we would become 12 years later. He knows us now and who we will be 12 years from now. There is hope in that. There is hope that God has a plan through it all for those who draw near to him.

As the seasons change outside, Steve and I enter another season of change in our own lives. Our family is growing, we are now homeschooling and entering in new adventures. Every now and then I have moments where I wonder if we are on the right track to where God wants us to be. This morning as I prayed, this scripture came to heart...

" And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." - Romans 8:28 (NKJV)

Then sings my soul...

12 years ago...

Today....

12 years from now and forever...

How great thou art!

And I know some of you like the details of our trip, so for you, this is Angora Lakes. It's a little off the beaten path in Tahoe, you know...unmarked roads...short hike to actually get to the lake, but it never disappoints. They have a tiny "resort" at the end where you can rent paddle boats, kayaks, paddle boards. My pictures do not give justice to it's beauty...