BUT FIRST

I wrote down the date yesterday and the number 10 just put me into a little state shock. 10! that means only 3 months left this year...I've really gotta get moving on those 2012 resolutions! Sometimes I can overwhelm myself with mental 'to-do' list...not 'mental' like psychotic, but 'mental' meaning in my head (I'm not sure that cleared anything up!) I'm trying to take goals one at a time and not overwhelm myself with the unfinished, untouched goals. I've really been working on making the most of family time. We started trying to go on weekly picnics to the park. That's a nice goal lately. After a busy summer, we are in need of some family down time.

I'm usually a "but first..." type of girl. You know, let's go on a picnic, but first...I'll have to wake up early and go to the store to make a fresh lunch. But first...I'll have to research the parks and pick the best one. But first...we'll have to pack up toys and activities for the kids. I'm not really sure why I do this, but I know I miss the point of the picnic when I do.  So I'm trying to refocus and remember the most important part of the picnic is spending time with my family. So we pick up a lunch, we drive around until we find a nice shady tree, we lay out the blanket already in our car and we play with whatever we find or was left in the car...

Grateful that I didn't let the 'but firsts...' get in my way and make me miss these moments.

 

Today's Reflection:

Sometimes I get so caught up on the "but firsts..." It frustrates me, because I miss out on great opportunities. I get so focused on  things only I care about and forget to look at what is really important. I can only imagine how frustrated God could get at me. He has beautiful plans for me, and here I am...

 

okay God, but first I have to become well versed in the bible

But first I have to pray more.

But first I have to stop making mistakes

But first I have to fix my life to a point I think is good enough.

 

and God is like...I just wanted to have a picnic with you, I'm asking you to just come and I'll handle the details.

 

I've got to stop trying to do what I think needs to get done and focus on what God's asking me to do.

 

" Those who think they can do it on their own end up obsessed with measuring their own moral muscle but never get around to exercising it in real life. Those who trust God’s action in them find that God’s Spirit is in them—living and breathing God! Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open, into a spacious, free life. Focusing on the self is the opposite of focusing on God. Anyone completely absorbed in self ignores God, ends up thinking more about self than God. That person ignores who God is and what he is doing. And God isn’t pleased at being ignored."

-Romans 8:5-8

A BOY AFTER MY HEART

 Our home was relaxed today. Lucia is a little under the weather so we wanted to keep her home and rested. Henry had a bit of a meltdown this morning when I would not let him wear his green lantern underwear. His desire to wear the same green lantern underwear he wore yesterday (which now sit with the dirty laundry) differed from mommy's desire, so we had a bit of a stand off. Eventually the issue was hashed out over a 'Curious George' book and he settled for cars underwear, because that beat mommy's idea of sending him back to bed.

 

This is what my battles look like now a days.

 

 

After that, him and I spent the morning listening to Broadway music on Pandora, I caught up with cleaning and he caught some bad guys in his cars underwear and batman pajama shirt. It was a happy time. Then Abba's 'Mama Mia' came on and my son began dancing around with the biggest smile on his face. I immediately started dancing with him and thought if it were socially acceptable I would dance around in my underwear all day to Broadway hits. I stopped to take in the moment, my beautiful little son, happy, dancing to Broadway, doing his own thing, making his mommy so proud. I thought to myself, "That's a boy after my heart," then God tugged at me and said "that's exactly how I feel about you."

 

 

Today's Reflection:

Sometimes I am absolutely humbled by God's Love.
When I feel off beat, like I'm dancing to showtunes in my underwear when others clearly are not, God looks at me and loves me, and says...That's exactly how I made you.

Nothing can compare to that love.

 

"nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

- Romans 8:39