BABIES

On Friday, I had planned on sharing these pictures..."Adventures of a young boy" I was going to call it. Pictures of my son, the quiet observer, lover of trains...

my little baby, who no longer feels hugs are required for Santa, just hand shakes and deals that he will be a good boy in exchange for a ninja turtle and a bad guy....

My little guy, who could not stop smiling and shouting 'Yee-haw...ride 'em cowboy' on the pony ride...

my sweetie pie, who falls into ponds while 'pretending to fish' but still keeps the smile on his face...

That's what I had planned on posting, and then I heard like many of you the horrible tragedies that took the life of too many, the awfulness that took away some body else's 'baby'. I couldn't bare to post, not while I knew there was another mother grieving over her baby. Like many of you I cried, I prayed, I asked God some questions, and then I sought him out.  I opened my bible and I looked for the comfort I needed, the promises I needed to hear.

 

Even now, I am relying on my faith and trust in God rather than my own understanding of the world. I know God is good. I know God loves us. I know that our sorrow is not ignored, as beautifully illustrated in scripture. Jesus feels our sorrow, and he weeps with us...

 

"When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied.

Jesus wept."

-John 11:33-35

 

I know he offers us refuge and comfort in times of trouble...

 

“…In the shadow of Your wings I will make my refuge, until these calamities have passed by”

-Psalm 57:1

and I know that in these times he in not absent, he is near...

 “The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit."

-Psalm 34:17

 

and when I got angry like I know some of you did too, I had to remember the God I love and know to be merciful, is also mighty and just and can handle evil far better than you and I could ever...

 

"God is jealous, and the Lord avenges;
The Lord avenges and is furious.
The Lord will take vengeance on His adversaries, and He reserves wrath for His enemies;
 The Lord is slow to anger and great in power, and will not at all acquit the wicked.

The Lord has His way
In the whirlwind and in the storm, and the clouds are the dust of His feet.
He rebukes the sea and makes it dry, and dries up all the rivers.
Bashan and Carmel wither, and the flower of Lebanon wilts.
The mountains quake before Him,
The hills melt, and the earth heaves at His presence,
Yes, the world and all who dwell in it.

Who can stand before His indignation?
And who can endure the fierceness of His anger?
His fury is poured out like fire, and the rocks are thrown down by Him."

-Nahum 1:2-6

 

Things like this should not happen, it is not okay. Yet, when they do happen, I have to keep God's word close and trust that he will keep his promises. I hope that they find you and perhaps help you like they did me.

 

And so I am grateful for my children and family and friends. I did not think it was possible to hold my little loves any tighter but it is and I have doubled my daily kisses to my children, from 1 million to 2 million. I mourn the loss of the lives taken on friday and I appreciate the precious gifts that have been given to me.