Sometimes I go out with the kids and people will look at me, baby strapped to my front, diaper bag around my shoulder, Henry wiggling in my hand. I usually get the comment "Oh, you've got your hands full don't you?" in which I just respond with a smile. I smile because I know this is just the beginning for me. I'm hoping for a couple more kids and I can only imagine what they'll be saying then! Some days I brave the big world alone just me and the kids, some days I am successful, and some days I am not. Yesterday, I was not.
It's been a while since I've been to the library and I had been wanting to go for the last couple of weeks. Finally I got up the nerve to go by myself...
He's such a good boy, he tried his hardest! I had to pull him off a couple of shelves and "shhh" him a couple of times. I had to explain to him that I could not stop and take a picture of him down every aisle when he would loudly yell, "take a picture to me mommy! take a picture!" I had to give an apologetic look to the librarians while he pulled the books off the shelves and then put them back in the wrong place (no respect for the Dewey decimal system!). When we got the children's area, I had to convince him that the Dinosaur book was much better than 'Cooking traditional Native American Cuisine' (which he found in the cooking aisle and carried the entire trip, referring to it as "my book")
Feeling semi-successful we checked out and began to leave. We got to the parking lot when the following happened, my son had pooped, I had to pee (really bad) and I could not find my car keys meanwhile Henry's playing with a dirty McDonald's cup he found by our car. With Lucia strapped to me, Henry in my hand a book bag and diaper bag around my neck, I quickly rushed back into the library and into the restroom. I nearly peed my pants, Lucia still strapped to me as I'm bent over the toilet, bags on the ground in the cramped stall and Henry trying to get into the "feminine" waste basket and crawling on the dirty floor into the stall next to us. I apologize if that's too much information, but other parents will more than likely get me and those without kids, perhaps this will shed some light on what it can really be like at times.
In the end I found my keys, and we made it home in one piece, but I felt completely defeated! So defeated, I needed a whole day to blog about it! On the bright side, I learned a lesson for the next time and we got some good books...
I find it ironic now that I got a bunch of books about 'Fun places to go with children'. I doubt that the library is listed in any of them!
Dear Lord, sometime I need your help in finding the bright side. Yesterday when I got home I felt completely defeated, but now that I'm looking at it I can see how you can present these opportunities for me to grow. I am walking away with the following; 1. I am grateful for my kids, forgive me for times I might not show my appreciation. 2. Things are not so bad, if I focus on the positives, the negatives quickly fade. 3. I really have nothing to complain about!
Thank you! I will not give up, you are a good God and with you, I can do this!